It’s kind of our culture’s greatest tradition to tell each other how to act and what’s good for us. “Just be confident!” is one of those vague directives that we’ve all heard a hundred times–it’s the apparent solution to all of our problems.
Episode 24: “Just Be Confident!” and Other Useless Advice for Fat People
The problem with “Just be confident” is that it’s often an order directing us to act and speak and look a certain way. Confidence becomes a performance instead of a tool. Body confidence is often even harder to achieve because it often comes with specific, designated performance metrics. But body confidence doesn’t look the same person to person. You don’t have to wear a bikini or show your arms to prove your body confidence.
Plus, body confidence doesn’t just suddenly explode out of us. It takes work and struggle and often a lot of self-doubt. And I’m pretty confident in my assertion that not a single one of us is confident twenty four hours a day. Too often we’re told to fake confidence until we make it, but why shouldn’t we talk about the hard days? Pretending that body acceptance is easy only alienates those among us who are struggling.
Thank you as always to Starcrusher for the music you hear on the show. Hear more at cstarcrusher.bandcamp.com, and this weekend (August 4-6) Bandcamp is donating proceeds to the Transgender Law Center in support of trans rights, so now is a great time to pick up Starcrusher’s album, Goodbye Halcyon Days.
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